Jessica Levity, 35 and Joseph Daylover, 40, were monogamous for
years until a pal mentioned polyamory -- having multiple
Eight years on, producer Jessica and university lecturer Joseph
said it's the "best decision" they ever made -- and they even go
on double dates.
...The couple from Reno in Nevada, USA, who have two children,
Azlan, three, and Lucius, four months, said they can't imagine
being monogamous ever again and consider dating others "a form
of self care".
Jessica [at left, rear] said: “I had no idea what
polyamory was until a friend mentioned it -- but as soon as I
learned it was a thing, I realised it was exactly what I had
been looking for. ... Our more serious partners very much become
part of our family and we are happy to make room for that -- it
all contributes to a more harmonious family life.”
[Jessica] said: “Discovering polyamory lit a fire in me. It
felt like I’d discovered an important part of my identity and
gave me a new zest for life. Everything felt like it made
sense all of a sudden.”
...[Joseph] said: “At first I wouldn’t want to know details of
what Jessica was doing, but our relationship developed into
what is known as a ‘kitchen table’ style.
“What that means is that we're friendly with each other's
partners -- they’ll come over for dinner or help with
childcare. It’s a very communal lifestyle and it contributes
to a harmonious family life.”
...Jessica said they're very open with their young children
about when they go on dates and their other partners, and will
continue to be as they grow up.
She said: "We want to teach our kids how to communicate, draw
clear boundaries, advocate for what you want in a
relationship, and how to recognise when a relationship has run
its course, like you might have to with a friend, for example.
...Jessica insists their polyamorous model actually makes it
easier to raise their youngsters -- saying: "I don't know how
people survive in a nuclear family -- it's one of the hardest
types of family I have experienced."...
...The pair now host a podcast, Remodeled, about polyamory,
which they use to educate others. ...
Jessica: "Whoever said you can’t ‘have your cake and eat it’
clearly didn’t have enough cake!"