"Love the Ones You're With"

iAfrica (South Africa)

I adored Stephen Still's tune Love the One You're With when it came out in 1970, and it's had staying power.

Enough that this morning, 43 years later, the South African news-and-features portal iAfrica used its name to title a Poly 101 article.

The piece draws heavily on longtime Cape Town poly organizer Melanie:

Love the ones you're with

By Bryony Whitehead

Could you be in a relationship with more than one person at the same time? It's a question that a small percentage of people can answer in the affirmative because they've tried it, openly and honestly.

They know that having successful romantic relationships with two or more people is about hard work, honest communication and transparency – just as it is with one person.

..."It has added to my life significantly and takes the stress off one person to interact with all my needs and desires," says Melanie, a South African polyamorist.

The official term for it is polyamory and it's one that is often met with derision and distaste by those who are monogamous. While many reject the idea for religious or cultural reasons, there are those who believe that loving two or more people at a time is not only possible, but a fulfilling and wonderful experience.

"More love is the greatest part of it, my love for others and their love me has really helped me grow and feel secure," Melanie adds.

"I have never been a natural monogamist, but the very idea of cheating is anathema to me."

...Coming from a liberal family, Melanie and her partners are able to live fairly openly, but she is aware that many in the polyamorist community in South Africa don’t have this privilege. She hopes that through careful education polyamorists could one day become more widely accepted.

When asked if she thinks polyamory could become more popular, Melanie says: “There will always be […] those who will continue to disapprove but I think that as long as everyone remembers that this is our choice and we do not impose it on others, it will grow."...

Learn more at www.polyamory.co.za

Read the whole article (Sept. 20, 2013).

There's been other poly in the South African media in the last few months. (Click on "media" at the link. The list, compiled by Greenfizzpops, goes back to 2003.)

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