Everyday Feminism: "The Myths and Facts of Polyamory"

An on-target explanation of some poly myths and truths appeared yesterday in an online feminist magazine that claims to have more than 70,000 subscribers.

More Than Two: Examining the Myths and Facts of Polyamory

By Laura Kacere

Source: Care2

...Often described as “consensual and responsible non-monogamy,” polyamory can characterize anyone who engages in intimate relationships with multiple people in a way that is consensual and communicative of all relationships. (That is, cheating on a partner doesn’t count as polyamory!)

These definitions are broad, and polyamorous relationships come in all different shapes and sizes....

Myth #1: With the right partner, you only need one person.

This myth can also sound a lot like “Polyamorous relationships aren’t real relationships.”... If your desires do not fit into [the monogamy] ideal, then there is something wrong with you.

But is there really anything wrong with not finding yourself completely fulfilled by one partner?... I’ve found, as have many others, that when the pressure to be everything is lifted, there is more space for me just to be me.

Myth #2: Polyamory means you love your partner(s) less.

...Our monogamous culture lives on the assumption that when it comes to romantic love, there is a love scarcity – that there isn’t enough love to go around....

Myth #3: Polyamory is for people who “just want to sleep around” and avoid attachment and intimacy.

...While this may be true of some people (poly and monogamous), polyamorous people tend to engage in very intimate and attached relationships....

Myth #4: Polyamory is for people who don’t get jealous.

...What is important is what you do with that feeling, and how you come to understand and deal with it.... There are strategies to survive and even work to unlearn jealousy. These can often be applied to other areas in our lives.

Myth #5: Polyamory is for enlightened people....


Fact #1: You are already complete....

Fact #2: Valuing all of your relationships....

Fact #3: Other people are not your competitors....

Fact #4: You have the right to choose....

Read the whole 1900-word article (Oct. 15, 2013).

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While we're on the subject, here are writer Angi Becker Stevens' Poly and Feminism articles at her site The Radical Poly Agenda.

Here are my posts tagged Feminism. And there's lots more out there.

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