Out and Proud: a student takes the plunge

The University Register
(University of Minnesota at Morris)

A college student tells of coming out poly:

The Loose Screw

by Jeanette Blalock [October 30, 2008]

...Today, many people are involved in polyamorous relationships, which is to say, loving relationships with more than one other person.

With these relationships come a host of new issues, both legal and personal, but they often just aren’t talked about. Why? Because simply being in a polyamorous relationship is often viewed as deviant, and some people have faced negative consequences as a result of their relationships....

But I also know that the triumphs of GLBT rights we have seen over the last few decades would not have been possible without the courage and temerity of people who decided to come out of the closet and talk openly about their lives and their relationships, to show that no, their lives weren’t all about sex acts the way the Moral Majority liked to think, and that in fact, gay and trans people live lives that are absolutely normal and boring, not shocking and deviant. Without people who were proud and open, there wouldn’t be gay rights in this country or any other.

With that in mind, let me tell you about my household.... The three of us live in one house, in two separate bedrooms. I divide my time as equitably as I can manage. The two of them are friends, and while jealousy issues have cropped up, they haven’t been so severe as to be dealbreakers – and I haven’t seen these jealousy issues as being any worse than what my monogamous friends confront in their relationships. We live ordinary, boring lives. We fight, we make up, we play video games, we pay our bills, we take our classes.

And as for the two men in my life: I love them both very, very much. And so, whenever I see people saying that sure, gay marriage is fine, but they absolutely draw the line at someone marrying more than one person, I cringe a little bit....

So that’s why I’m talking to you about this today, in spite of the fact that just writing this column is likely to cause me grief from future employers, or a shocked and dismayed phone call from my parents, who know of but do not entirely approve of my relationships. Being out and proud makes a difference.

Read the whole article.

For the brave (and the secure), there's something to be said for burning your bridges early. That phrase comes from the likes of Julius Caesar, who would sometimes order his army to burn the makeshift bridges they'd built to cross a river — so that they would know the only way out of trouble was forward.

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