Valentine's Poly on Virginia TV
It continues. "Feather and I were interviewed for 90 minutes this morning by our local ABC TV station," wrote Andy, a member of Hampton Roads Polyamory (HaRP), to the Polyamory Leadership Network almost three weeks ago. "This will be broadcast on Monday Feb. 13 in the Hampton Roads area of Virginia (Virginia Beach, Norfolk, Newport News, etc.). The station may end up interviewing two other people for additional material. It has been deliberately timed to air a day prior to Valentine's Day."
Sure enough, watch it here on the news. (If the link fails, try here.) It's a little over 3 minutes long. The TV people strike a tone of being amazed and incredulous (this is standard procedure), but they let the poly folks get their messages across. And they certainly showcase the word, both verbally and on screen, which is what we really need for the most interested viewers to go googling.
Remember, folks, if you're dealing with the media, have a bunch of key messages that you've rehearsed as sound bites (both long and short). And whatever you're asked, find ways to segue into these key messages. Don't be shy about repeating them no matter what you're asked. The editors will use your one best take. You come off looking much clearer, more self-possessed, and more authoritative this way, than if you only react to questions.
And stay loose, folks. Move, dramatize, ham it up, have fun. In this show, notice how much more effective and persuasive the poly people are, with their difficult-to-sell message, when they're moving and demonstrative than when they're sitting still. Your body language says way more about you and your relationship than your words.
Is this "an act"? Of course it is! When you're on camera, like it or not you're an actor!
There's also an article on the station's website with the video link. A HaRP member notes, "There are some misquotes and quotes attributed to wrong people."
Polyamory: a different take on love and relationships
By LaSalle Blanks
NORFOLK -- Polyamory -- it's a different take on love and committed relationships.
Polyamory allows committed couples to openly date others.
They say it's not just about physical companionship -- it's about establishing deep, meaningful relationships with people other than your primary partner or spouse.
Feather and Andy have been married for six years. Lee has been dating Kelly for three years -- she's one of his six girlfriends. One of those girlfriends is also dating the married Andy. He sees her once a week.
"He has a smile on his face when he comes home so I knew he had a good time," says Andy's wife Feather.
The couples are quick to say they are not swingers.
"The difference between swinging and poly in my mind is it's the relationship," Andy explains.
Lee says it's about intimacy.
"There are plenty of people who I'm in relationships with who we have a lot of intimacy, but we're not sleeping together," he notes.
Feather calls it "responsible monogamy." [This is a misquote for non-monogamy.]
"I know where he is and who he's with and he knows where I am and who I'm with," she says.
The couples say it's essential to have that openness, especially when it comes to health issues like STDs. "If I were to get a positive result back, I would be sharing it with my partner immediately," says Kelly.
They believe this openness means no cheating, no deceit.
Lee and Kelly and Andy and Feather say communication is essential so jealousy doesn't creep into these multiple love relationships.
Andy says being with one person isn't for him.
"Variety, variety is the spice of life," he says. "We have a loving relationship -- that's important."
There are polyamorous groups across the country. In Hampton Roads, HARP has 500 people on its email list.
The original (Feb. 13, 2012).
P.S.: A reminder, if you're a poly group or an open couple willing to do media together, you're in demand! Get listed for reporters and producers to find you at the Polyamory Media Association. Study the advice there, and take the free training (Skype is all you need). Getting trained in representing yourself well to the public is a huge life skill that will serve you far beyond anything to do with poly.